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Is Full House Tournament Fighter the greatest family sitcom fighting game never made?

Sure, we can go back and forth all day regarding the benefits of Ryu vs. Blanka, Sub Zero vs. Raiden, and so on. But what about Uncle Jesse vs. Joey?

While the outcome of such a matchup has long been a complicated philosophical quandary that would plague the mind of even the most learned scholar, there may some answer in sight, thanks to a young man named Lucas Zebroski and his creation: Full House Tournament Fighter.

Okay, while the game isn’t the real deal, it’s probably as close as we’re ever going to get to a fighting game featuring the cast of Full House. (It even has Comet the dog!) Heck, it’s probably the closest we’re going to get to a fighting game featuring the cast of any ’80s (or early ’90s) family sitcom.

So let’s pretend it’s an actual game and marvel at the comical martial arts antics of Joey’s puppet-powered pugilism, shall we?

Of course, no game featuring Uncle Jesse would be complete without a move that launched hair gel or wicked power chords at his opponents.

Oh, and get a load of that finishing move. We haven’t seen anything that humiliating since the Mortal Kombat babalities.