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This is the single, most ridiculous way to cook a turkey

Every year, a Thanksgiving Allstate insurance commercial hits the airwaves to remind us that about 15 million people will succeed in lighting their homes on fire trying to deep fry a turkey. Usually, this involves dropping a whole turkey in a giant pot of hell hot oil and miscalculating when to take the turkey out. The problem with deep frying turkey is it’s hard to see how the exterior is looking when the pot is covering most of the meat. So, why not cook turkey with the world’s brightest, hottest, strongest flashlights?

We’ve reviewed Wicked Lasers’ Torch flashlight earlier this year and showed you several examples of the device cooking omelettes and plastic cups, so it’s no surprise that six of these bad boys will roast an entire turkey in two and a half hours. Which is ridiculously impressive when you consider that a 15-pound turkey will take at least three and a half hours to fully roast. According to the video, the internal temperature of the turkey reaches 177.8 degrees fahrenheit at the 2.5-hour mark, rendering it done and ready to eat. The turkey also comes with a crispy, golden brown skin that looks impossibly delicious, even through YouTube.

We’re not quite sure what the validity of this video is, since the Wicked Lasers Torch only have a battery life of about six minutes meaning the videographer is either continually changing batteries or the whole thing is a hoax. Still, it sure is crazy to watch. We don’t particularly recommend cooking turkey this season with six 4,100-lumen flashlights, and I think I speak for all of us when I say this is the single, most insane way to prepare a Thanksgiving meal ever. However, if you enjoy constantly switching out batteries and watching a turkey literally torched to perfection, this is definitely the way to go about it.

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