Jon Stewart launches $10 billion fake Kickstarter to purchase CNN

Rupert Murdoch’s 21st Century Fox made an $80 billion bid for Time Warner Cable recently. If the bid hadn’t failed, Fox would have sold CNN as part of the deal. In light of this, Jon Stewart, whose disdain for CNN is well documented, announced a fake Kickstarter campaign to purchase CNN.

The fake campaign asks for $10 billion in an effort to “rebuild a news organization befitting this proud land. Or, more likely, we’d use it to make a lot more poop jokes.” Stewart even launched a website in support of the campaign. Rewards include the opportunity to appear in a CNN 21 box, 6 box, or a 2 box. In addition, if you lose your car keys for any reason, CNN would air 24-hour coverage of your hunt for them. Likely the most popular reward, though, will be a Hunger Games-stylized fight to the death involving CNN anchors.

Fox would have sold CNN in order to avoid potential antitrust issues, and while the bid was reportedly rejected, Murdoch apparently isn’t resting until he gets Time Warner Cable. Currently, Comcast is making a push to purchase the media conglomerate for $45 billion, though the deal has yet to be approved.

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