I never get tired of telling people how awesome online dating is – when done right it can yield meaningful connections and fruitful, romantic relationships. At the same time, I’m happy to be done with all that. And the biggest reason is this: Online dating is a hit-or-miss situation, and for every hit, you get a crap load of misses.
Tinder is supposedly the hottest new dating app available today, allowing individuals to socialize a lot easier through their smartphones and quickly get to know matches through their Facebook profiles (which is required to be able to use the service). The way it resembles a catalogue of dateables that you can easily peruse by swiping amplifies the collect-and-select nature of playing the field, and since its launch last December, the app’s monthly active users have grown exponentially, proving that it’s fun, it’s addicting, and it’s definitely worth trying out. Of course the fact that so many people are getting on the Tinder bandwagon means it has also become a treasure trove of horrifying profile photos, creepy pick-up lines, and hilarious and cringe-worthy instant messages that would make anyone rethink online dating altogether.
Here are a couple of Tumblr blogs, Facebook pages, Twitter feeds, and sites that can help you weed out the absolute worst of Tinder (also to be interpreted as where you can send your terrifyingly horrible Tinder moments).
Normally, I’d be willing to believe the adage “Don’t judge a book by its cover,” but on an online dating site or app, profile pictures are everything. As a personal rule, impressions are a no-no (so are stuffed animals and tighty-whities). Also, we’re so over Gangnam Style. Next!
To start a spark with a potential partner, quality of conversation is key. I’ve never been a fan of moldy old pick-up lines, and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better. See for yourself:
Oh, and it’s not just the dudes who are “killing it:”
This Facebook community is actually pretty new, but it’s already got over a thousand likes, so maybe it’s worth keeping it in your radar. It’s early, but there are some unbelievable gems:
Just in case you’re still having second thoughts about it, butt cracks are a DEFINITE NO. Repeat: Swipe left and move on.
— Tinder Problems (@tinderprobs) August 7, 2013
Bathroom selfies are the absolute worst, no matter how chiseled your body is.
Also, HELL NO.
Here’s a helpful hint: If you want to be taken seriously on Tinder, try not to look like a creepy criminal stalker. You’re not Jesse Pinkman. You could never be Jesse Pinkman.
From what I gathered, this Twitter handle is managed by a woman, so if you’re a gal looking for someone to commiserate with, check out her collection of “interesting” people:
Nice shirt… Oh wait. pic.twitter.com/G7X5pw8KoU
— Tinder Yikes (@TinderYikes) July 8, 2013
Added to this list, as per Tinder Yikes’ advice above. Don’t worry – apparently, people still value honesty.
Tinder is no place to be shy pic.twitter.com/LWl6klb2KT
— Tinder Shots (@tinder_shots) August 9, 2013
Don’t completely lose hope – it’s not all awful (although it may seem that way). Worst case scenario: You might find someone who can inspire your next short story:
Unfortunately, at the end of the day, the Interwebs is teeming with them.