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Protect your fertility with Wireless Armour, the new smart underwear for men

Dudes, let’s get personal for a minute. Protecting your most valuable bodily assets from the potentially harmful side effects of electromagnetic radiation is becoming more and more difficult in this digital day and age. In order to stay connected to your work, your dates, or your family, you’re constantly carrying around a cellphone in your pants pocket or balancing a laptop on your knee. But with recent studies suggesting a more concrete link between the radiation emitted by these devices and reduced fertility, it seems that the technology that should make you a more desirable mate is also stabbing you in the back. That’s why you need Wireless Armour, the underwear “that aims to protect male fertility against 99.9 percent of harmful electromagnetic radiation emitted by Wi-Fi devices including smartphones and laptops.”

Developed by British scientist Joseph Perkins, this new line of high-tech, “‘smart, wearable tech’ Wi-Fi shielding men’s underwear” has been described by Sir Richard Branson as “underpants for superheroes.” For £24 to £35 ($38 – $55), you can own a pair for yourself. The secret is in the fabric used in the design and manufacturing of the unmentionables, called RadiaTex. According to the Wireless Armour website, this impressive technology “features a mesh of pure silver woven into the fabric which creates an unbroken shield against electromagnetic radiation as silver is one of the top conductors of electricity.”

Related: YONO is the inner ear wearable for women looking to conceive

Silver has certainly become a popular component of smart fabrics, featured in a number of other products like this high-tech replacement for the Icy Hot patch. The metal of choice for many next generation textiles, blends of silver and cotton are meant to make fabrics like RadiaTex both soft and strong. Moreover, Wireless Armour insists, the addition of silver makes their underpants “highly antimicrobial, which means they increase hygiene by preventing the spread of bacteria and other microbes.”

Wireless armour underwear

Like many of the other smart clothing products designed to protect, monitor, or otherwise delight, Wireless Armour’s integration of technology into fashion is to make taking advantage of its advanced functions “as easy as getting dressed.” In the case of Wireless Armour, of course, this function is particularly specific, but there’s certainly room for expansion when it comes to RadiaTex. After all, there’s no reason why more clothing can’t be made from the same material, protecting the entire body from harmful radiation.

As Perkins told the Daily Mail, “Wireless Armour is designed to protect the health of a wireless generation glued to their mobile devices.” It’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it.