Bidet, mate! Feature-packed seat converts your toilet into a luxury spa

You know all that talk about paperless offices? Imagine if you could take the same idea to your bathroom. No, we’re not talking about checking your emails on the toilet (because nobody does that, right?), but rather an alternative solution to wiping your butt with reams of toilet paper — courtesy of a smart water-spraying bidet that sits on top of your existing seat.

“The Swash 1400 is our latest-and-greatest model of electronic bidet toilet seat,” Annie Breen, marketing communications manager for manufacturer Brondell, told Digital Trends. “It’s packed with features that were specifically selected after years of consumer research, which resulted in us keeping the best of our Swash 1000 — the previous top model — and developing new refinements to create our sleekest and most advanced bidet seat ever.”

Like a Swiss Army Knife of toilet seats, the Swash 1400 offers a wide range of abilities. There are dual stainless-steel sterilized nozzles (uncommon in an industry where most bidets use inferior nozzles made of plastic), complete with customizable nozzle positions, water temperatures, water pressures, and spray widths.

The seat also offers a warm-air dryer, deodorizer, heated seat, and even a soothing night light with cool blue hue for those midnight trips to the bathroom. In addition, users get a remote control that lets two people customize their perfect settings.

There are plenty of other neat features, and a streamlined design which doesn’t feature visible wires or a hose — or look like you’ve jammed a massive bulky smart seat on top of your existing toilet.

The Swash 1400 is currently raising money on Kickstarter, where at time of writing it had attracted $110,444 from 223 backers. If you want to get your hands (and, well, not just your hands) on a unit you can do so with a pre-order, starting $474. Shipping is set to take place in March 2017.

Make sure you hurry, though, as there are only a few days left in the campaign.