You know what they say about people in Glass houses?

Google Glass Twitter Winners

Google announced a Twitter contest to determine who receives the first batch of Glass. The list of winners was just released and we regret to inform you that you’re not on it. The list is a veritable “Who’s that?” of tastemakers and elegant people in technology, entertainment, and even sport. See how I said sport and not sports? That’s cause that is how people that wear Glass say it, likely with a pinky extended from their espresso cup. Even Will Smith is on the list. No, not that Will Smith, but still!!

The contest has not been without a few hiccups as some winners were recently disqualified for applications that “don’t comply with [the official terms of the contest].” I really hope @AYTM made the cut, as he is a self-described, “queef of information” who would use Glass to be “always be hands free! enough reason to supply the world!” Well said, sir. Well said. And god help us if @astrodakid, lover of “skateboards and bongs” is excluded. I can’t think of a better use of Google’s newest technology than his willingness to show how the “life of a artist and rave partier really goes.” Go @astrokid. No, seriously. Go.

Glass won’t help Newt Gingrich find Obama’s birth certificate

Some might see such applicants and view this list as half-full, to others it’s half-empty. I choose to look at the list as twice as big as it needed to be.

While Google states that 7% of the winners have more than 10,000 followers, it is the famous names on the list that grab everyone’s attention. The one with the most Twitter followers at over 5.5 million is Neil Patrick Harris. There’s no doubt about why he’s included on the list. First known as Doogie Howser, M.D. and now most famous for his role as Barney on “How I Met Your Mother,” the very funny and talented Mr. Harris will expose Glass to a younger, hipper crowd, much like he did with the Tony Awards [COUGH! COUGH!].

Also included on the list is LeVar Burton, who has nearly 1.8 million followers. While it makes perfect sense why LeVar Burton is here, what’s not clear is how the hell LeVar Burton has so many followers. He is followed closely by Newt Gingrich, who I’m guessing wants to use Glass to help him look for President Obama’s birth certificate. And Christian Ponder, quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings who I imagine will use Glass to cut down on the 18 interceptions he threw last year. That being said, I’m fully for Christian Ponder’s inclusion on this list. I think it would be very interesting to see way more of his life outside of football. Please, Christian?

Google Glass Twitter Contest Winners

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Looking through the list of winners it’s hard to figure out what Google was looking for. Did they want developers and tech people to gain exposure to their technology or was it more important to have it be seen in a Soulja Boy video? The answer to this question is yes. They want it everywhere. Most of all they want you to buy it and they believe the more it becomes woven into our culture, the more likely you are to do exactly that. They want you to have product envy. Like when you were a kid and saw Dee Brown wear the Reebok Pumps as he won the NBA slam dunk contest and then kids in your class started to wear them to school. You felt left out so you begged your mom to get them for you. Finally, she did and then you wore them to play ball at the gym, only to realize they didn’t make you a better basketball player. Sure, it inflated your heel with air, but you still couldn’t dribble with your left hand and/or jump. Well, this is the same thing. Glass won’t help Gingrich find Obama’s birth certificate or help Christian Ponder be a good quarterback or help LeVar Burton find a new role (sorry, that’s a cheap shot).

For those of us that want Glass and aren’t famous or as clever as @astrodakid, we’ll have to wait until it comes on the market. Hopefully, by that point the price will drop below the estimated $1500 and Alyssa Milano will have helped work out the kinks. As of now, these are our Neil Armstrongs of eyewear, venturing to go where only this guy, and this guy, and probably a bunch of folks at Google have gone before – one small blink for man, one giant wink for mankind.

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