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WTF, Internet? Overexposed celebs don’t get to pick which parts of their life go viral

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Sometime within the last two weeks, you probably saw a glorious video making the Internet rounds.

That’s right, the duo we’ve come to collectively know as Kimye (or Kim Kardashian and Kanye West if you’re over the age of 21/don’t watch a lot of reality television/have a healthy amount of self respect) has finally gotten engaged!

Unfortunately the blessed event is tainted by a lawsuit. The couple are suing Chad Hurley for recording the proposal and then disseminating the video evidence to various online publications, even after agreeing to do exactly not that.

So this happened last night. Congrats Kim & Kanye!

— Chad Hurley (@Chad_Hurley) October 23, 2013

The attempts at keeping the moment private make sense given how secretive Kardashian and West are; “discreet” is the name of the game when it comes to these two. Especially since they went to great lengths to enjoy their proposal free of the public eye!

Except, oh wait, she’s most known for a sex tape, a reality show, and a wedding that aired on E! (plus a divorce that played out largely on the same network) and he is … Kanye West. No further explanation needed.

There’s also that whole thing where the proposal took placed at AT&T Park stadium, people were invited (including quiet and not-at-all-fame-hungry Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis), West showed up in a limo, an orchestra was present, and the jumbotron – which can be seen from outside the park – flashed “PLEEEASE MARRY MEEE!!!” Small, details – this was personal, Chad Hurley. How dare you interrupt this quiet couples’ private life.

If I haven’t layered the sarcasm on thick enough, please see this exaggerated eye roll, courtesy Liz Lemon.

Sure, Hurley – YouTube’s co-founder – shouldn’t have violated the agreement he signed to not share the proposal with publications. And apparently he shouldn’t have even been there in the first place. Yes, using the recording to promote his new app, MixBit, is also rather slimy.

However, pictures and video had already been uploaded to Twitter and Instagram, so Hurley figured he was in the clear. In his defense, it’s something of an unwritten rule of Web publishing: Embargo or no, if everyone breaks it, you can too.

But more importantly, what in Yeezus’ name did Kardashian and West expect? They court fame and they court fame hard – it is literally her full time job. And that doesn’t just mean these two pose for paparazzi shots or weirdly live out their lives for E! television, they are making ample use of social networking as well. Really, what two people make this exchange public:


A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on

… And then claim their privacy was invading because of the proposal video? Posting your assets and referencing your sex life is – and I think I’m speaking for most adult humans here – pretty damn personal.

This isn’t a bout of slut-shaming: If you want to tweet what has been termed a “butt selfie” at your baby daddy, by all means, please! Go forth and e-tease! But please expect to be called a giant hypocrite when you start boo-hooing about a few seconds of your engagement going viral. You invited – nay, begged – us to pay attention to your tweets, photos, blog posts, but then cry foul when this specific one is sent into the Internet’s ether without your stamp of approval.

If you want to be a celebrity – a real one, an Instagram one, a Twitter one, whatever – then you have to take your knocks. You don’t get to pick and choose which parts of your life get picked up by websites or retweeted into oblivion. It all comes with the territory of living a life fully documented online, and otherwise. So put away your lawsuit, and just start giving the people what they want: More Instagrams of your obnoxiously over-documented lives.

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