Tight-fitting shirts don’t look good on about, oh, 99 percent of us guys – give or take. Most guys simply lack the physique to pull off the look (whether it looks good or not is a different debate). But now a UK company called Funkybod has created a shirt with fake padded pecs that gives dudes even less reason to work out. Yes, someone has invented the exact opposite of the Manzierre.
We’re surprised we haven’t already seen something like this before, but this can’t be first of its kind. It’s been a decade since George Michael Bluth wore his muscle suit, after all. Just like bras that give women an extra lift, the padded undershirt uses the same concept – to give off the illusion that you do five sets of chest presses and flies every day, without looking like a Halloween fake muscle costume. The shirt also helps reshape man boobs, or moobs, by compressing them into something more flattering. The shirts, which come in white, black, and gray, aren’t cheap at almost $50 each – which can get you about 15 Hanes tees.
Of course, the problem with most guys’ physiques isn’t just in the chest area, but the beer gut, and the Funkybod shirt won’t help you there. The shirt is really designed for men who have an average body to begin with, so if you’re carrying a spare tire, it’s not going to help. You could wear a Spanx tightening shirt underneath this padded shirt to create a complete look, but just remember reality will set in once you take the shirt off. Nothing will kill your date’s mood faster than if your entire chest and biceps come off with your shirt. Then again, if you turn the light off first, maybe you can pull it off. If you’re bold enough to give it a try, let us know how it goes.
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