Babies, Alpacalypse, and Satanic Willem Dafoe: The 2013 Super Bowl car ads

The Super Bowl may still be the “Big Game,” but the commercials that run between plays have become almost as big an attraction. So big, in fact, that many of them have already aired. If you don’t want to get distracted from watching the Ravens and 49ers on Sunday, check out these Super Bowl car ads, which are already racking up page views on the Interwebs.

Audi: “Prom”

The classic high school nightmare, not having a date for prom, is remedied (sort of) by the Audi A6. Nothing apparently gets a teenage male’s testosterone flowing like a 3.0-liter supercharged V6 and LED headlights.

Hyundai: “Epic Playdate”

If you buy a Hyundai Santa Fe, the Flaming Lips will follow you around and provide a soundtrack to your life. So you’d better think of interesting things to do, like hanging out with a sabertooth tiger, getting chased by bikers, and Zorbing, to make the most of it. Hyundai will actually show four ads during the Big Game; others will highlight the Sonata Turbo and Genesis sedan.

Kia: “Space Babies”

Kia is pitching itself as the car of choice for creative parents. In this imaginative ad, a Sorento-driving dad tries to dodge the question of where babies come from with a fantastic story about a faraway baby planet. The part about rockets penetrating the atmosphere was amusing… Or maybe we’re reading too much into this.

Lincoln: “#SteerTheScript”

Lincoln decided to go all 21st century with its commercial. With the help of Jimmy Fallon and his many followers, Lincoln compiled thousands of tweets about epic road trips under the #SteerTheScript hashtag. Unlike some more impatient car companies, Lincoln won’t air the finished product until Sunday night. So far, its teaser involves movie aliens, a wedding, and something called the “Alpacalypse.”

That doesn’t have much to do with cars, though. Lincoln’s ad will feature the MKZ, the brand’s Ford Fusion-based midsize luxury sedan.

Mercedes-Benz: “Soul”

Would you make a deal with the devil (played by Willem Dafoe) for the new 2013 CLA-Class, Mercedes’ stylish new compact “four-door coupe?” We’d probably hold out for an SLS AMG Black Series. The main character thinks his soul is worth more too: he declines when learning of the CLA’s $29,900 base price. That probably doesn’t buy the ability to keep up with Formula 1 cars, as the Satanic CLA does in one scene.

Toyota: “Wish Granted”

If the Flaming Lips aren’t your thing, how about a genie with your new SUV? Kudos to Toyota for sneaking a mention of the 2013 RAV4’s more car-like styling into a joke about a balding father’s desire to have his “spare tire” disappear. The realistic take on a young girl’s wish to be a princess was a little too ironic, though.

Volkswagen: “Get In, Get Happy”

Apparently, a Beetle can transform white office workers into rastas. Volkswagen’s ad features a man from Minnesota talking in a Jamaican accent, thanks to his car’s power to impart good vibes to him and anyone who rides in it. It’s a slightly creepy take on one of the world’s most un-creepy cars.