Somehow, it’s happened again. You are somewhere between mere days to a week away from Halloween (depending on your celebration scheduling) and you remain without costume. It’s understandable: You want to find something that’s relevant without sacrificing a lot of time or money; you want it to be funny and topical without explaining it all night. And you want it to pay homage to an Internet meme or trope.
You’ve come to the right place. Consider this a last-minute crash course in what you need and how to become one of the best or more current memes around – and how to do it by the simplest means possible.
Try and get some combination of the above – the only absolute necessities, however, are eats of some sort and the face paint. A white onesie with the hat ears and a fake fur vest are an optimal combo, but if you can’t procure all of these items, cat ears, a white shirt with a brown sweatshirt, and the face paint will do. And if you’re that person, you can wear a white spandex dress and fur shrug if you want to be Sexy Grumpy Cat (god save us). Everything can be found on Amazon, at Goodwill, or an all-in-one store like Target – or, of course, a Halloween superstore. If you want to take it a step further, grab a piece of cardboard, some scissors, and a marker and make your very own meme border (look to Imgur for inspiration).
As for the face paint, watch this excellent tutorial on becoming Grumpy Cat herself. You must also frown – all night. The potential wrinkles are worth it.
There are some pretty complicated, time-intensive ways to make this costume – or there’s the real easy one. First wrap your midsection and arms in plastic wrap. Then take your multiple bags of fake spider web and using the glue, attach it to the wrap – if there’s an old shirt you don’t care about, you can use fabric wrap and do the same, just make sure the shirt (or wrap) is thoroughly covered in a thick later of web. Perhaps ask for help, otherwise count on gluing your index finger and thumb together with Krazy Glue, as usual. Then take the plastic sharks, and glue them to this layer. You’ve now become the most dangerous thing known to mankind.
That poor little Monkey. It may have been trapped, but it was the doing the capturing – of our hearts. Easily recreate this meme with just a few items; a tan coat with some sort of fuzzy collor and cuff is the thing you need though. Try Amazon, Etsy, eBay … seriously, this popped up on a ton of sites – not to mention a scour at your local Goodwill store could yield something. If not, a tan coat plus a quick trip to the fabric store for fake white fur or fuzz plus fabric glue will easily do the trick. A pair of knock off Uggs (or the real deal if you already have ’em) will round things out, and you’ll need a fuzzy brown hat of some sort. You can paint your face (here’s a tutorial for monkey mimicing) or print out a mask from the Internet.
The hottest new fitness trend this year was absolutely Prancercise. Why run, dance, walk, breathe – when you can prance? If you want to go as the lady who brought us this craze herself, you’ve got an easy task ahead of you. Grab some tight-fitting white pants (yoga pants, spandex pants, leggings – whatever you can find), a pink cardigan, some sort of baubley gold necklace, some gray ankle weights, white tennis shoes – and of course, an as 80s as-it-gets wig. Most of this can be found at any department and athletic stores, save the wig, which may entail a quick Amazon order or a trip to the costume shop. And then, of course, you must prance like your body knows no bounds.
This one’s an oldie but a goodie – and since @Horse_ebooks was recently revealed to be a real person (damnit), it’s timely. Really, all you need is that iconic horse mask, which can be found all over the Internet as well as at just about any Halloween store. The next step is a shirt, which there are actually a few great versions of online. But if don’t have the time, then just buy a white tee and a set of fabric markers, have some patience, and try and recreate what one of @Horse_ebooks tweets looks like, Twitter icons included.
Actresses without teeth
One of the greatest Tumblrs of all time is absolutely Actresses without teeth – and it’s also a super easy costume. Break out the old prom dress, buy an Oscar statue replica (I saw one on Amazon for $10, or just grab any old trophy from Goodwill), and you will definitely need teeth blackout. A Halloween store or costume shop is your best bet for this. Also, some bright lipstick will really bring out your lack of teeth.
While performing at the Super Bowl this past year, Beyonce made a rather unflattering pose and face and unfortunately for her, this moment lives on in Internet infamy. And it can be a meme costumes as well. You’ll need some sort of leather (or leather looking) get-up; this can be interpreted depending on your modesty levels. Go for it in a daring, barelegged body suit, or don some pleather shorts (which, yes, are real and can be found rather easily), a blank tank, and call it good. You will need a flowing blonde wig, some fake arms, and of course – an inflatable dumbbell to show off those massive biceps, brah (which, you can make yourself with tape, marker, balloons, and a cane). For those latter two, just hit up the Internet or a Halloween store and you should be set. This might seem like a lady costume by defacto, but I think some gentlemen out there could really do this one justice.
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