After brushing your teeth and washing your face, your last ritual before bed is plugging in that smartphone. Because if you don’t, there’s no way that sucker’s lasting another full day after the workout you gave it today. We’ll admit that the battery life on some modern smartphones is pretty dismal, but if you’re downing a full charge day after day, you might need to lay off the juice.
In a moment of clumsiness, you went to remove it from your pocket for the 37th time in the last hour, slipped, and sent it pinwheeling toward pavement, where it landed with a sickening crack. Or, in a moment of carelessness, you let it slip out of your pocket on the train, waiting to be snatched up by some hawkeyed bum. Even worse, in a less-than-sober moment, you dropped it into a fountain (which is not a urinal, by the way). Whatever the circumstances, you can’t stop replaying the event in your mind, running over its irreplaceable digital contents in your mind, and kicking yourself for letting it happen. Maybe you even have dreams about a reunion with your long-lost friend. Er, phone. When the symptoms start to border post-traumatic stress disorder, it’s time to move on.
“You have an iPhone too? Oh awesome, have you tried the PDXBus app yet? Yea, this case is pretty cool, but I’m getting this metallic one soon that’s even slimmer.”
If this sounds at all like a conversation you might have upon meeting someone with the same smartphone, you should reconsider your smartphone addiction and your social life.
2. You feel a brief moment of panic when you touch your pocket (or grope to the bottom of your purse) and it’s gone.
We’re not talking about a lost phone here, just realizing you left it at home. And feeling the skipped heartbeat of sheer terror.
“What if people try to call me?”
“What if I can’t find the nearest Starbucks without asking someone?”
“What will my Twitter followers think?”
Take a deep breath before you need an iDefibrillator app and forge on without your faithful digital assistant. Life will be OK.
This is just wrong. But not for hygienic reasons as you all suspect. If you’re using your smartphone on the can, you’ve just robbed yourself of your last refuge from interruption. You’ve tainted mankind’s last fortress of solitude by draggeing the entire equivalent of a computer into the equation. Can’t you live five minutes without e-mail? Really?