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Facebook’s Conversations tool proves we swear a hell of a lot

Facebook recently revealed its latest feature, Facebook Conversations. This tool is actually two different sets of APIs that Facebook is making available to a handful of media partners, with data harvested and made available in new ways to these partners. It will parsed, more specific, and easier to draw conclusions from. One of the first published conclusions? We are some disgusting, fouled mouth beasts.

Slate is one of the partners privy to the new APIs, and less than a week after Facebook Conversations were introduced, the site has published its first go at using this new data to learn something about us – how we swear. You know; curse, cuss, castigate, blaspheme.

Using the new APIs, Slate found that younger people are more likely to swear on Facebook (color us surprised!). It also proved that no matter your gender, you largely like to use the same bad language. You can check out these charts in their entirety over on Slate.

  Men Women
1  sh*t  sh*t
2  fu*k fu*k 
3 damn damn 
4  bit*h bit*h 
5 crap crap

In fact, across different ages, we all tend to prefer the same profanities. With, of course, the adorable exception of “darn” from the oldies!

  13-17 18-24 25-34 35-44 45-54 55+
1 fu*k fu*k sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t
2 sh*t sh*t fu*k damn damn damn
3 bit*h bit*h damn fu*k crap fu*k
4 damn damn bit*h crap fu*k crap
5 dick dick crap bit*h bit*h darn

These words are also pretty interchangeable by region. Sure, the order of curse word preference mildly varies…

  Midwest West South Northeast
1 sh*t fu*k sh*t sh*t
2 fu*k sh*t fu*k fu*k
3 damn damn damn damn
4 bit*h bit*h bit*h bit*h
5 crap crap crap crap

… but not a whole bunch – until we get to country. That’s where the real fun starts. 

  U.S. Britain Canada Australia
1 sh*t fu*k fu*k fu*k
2 fu*k sh*t sh*t sh*t
3 damn bloody damn bit*h
4 bit*h piss bit*h bloody
5 crap bit*h crap c*nt
6 piss crap piss damn
7 dick c*ck dick crap
8 darn c*nt darn dick
9 c*ck damn c*ck piss
10 p*ssy dick a**hole c*ck
11 a**hole bastard fag bugger
12 fag bugger bastard fag
13 bastard fag douche slut
14 slut p*ssy p*ssy bastard
15 douche bollocks bloody p*ssy
16 bloody slut slut a**hole
17 c*nt arsehole bugger darn
18 bugger darn c*nt douche
19 bollocks a**hole arsehole arsehole
20 arsehole douche bollocks bollocks

We just have to be different, don’t we America? I do find it incredibly surprising that enough U.S. citizens use the words “bollocks” or “arsehole” on Facebook for it to break the top 20, so yeah, you just learn something new every day. It’d be more interesting to see the discrepancy in usage; i.e. “Eight Americans ever used ‘bugger’ on Facebook but we couldn’t come up with more than 20 fairly obvious swear words so … number 18 it is!”

Well there we have it: The first published effort of commoditizing the new Facebook APIs. Big data is going to go cry itself to sleep now.

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