10 things you could buy with $200,000 instead of the new Lamborghini Urus

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus
After months of anticipation, luxury automobile manufacturer Lamborghini finally unveiled the Urus SUV. Packed with the company’s first production turbocharged engine — a twin-turbo 4.0-liter V8, 650 horsepower, and 627 pound-feet of torque the Lamborghini Urus is nothing short of an automotive monster, but all of this engineering, of course, comes at a cost — $200,000, to be exact. This ungodly sum of cash got us to thinking, instead of buying this big car how could one just as easily, irrationally, and conspicuously blow this much cash? Here are the most investment- savvy ways to burn nearly a quarter of a million clams. Period.

125 Spike the Beetle original pieces of art

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus spike

Spike the Stag beetle made our list of best pets of Instagram for his general charm, ornate tea parties, and, of course, his penchant for marker-on-canvas original creations. Spike’s original magnum opus auctioned earlier this year and sold on eBay for nearly $1,600. Spike’s next piece will be sold in the coming months with 20 percent of the proceeds going to People’s Trust for Endangered Species (PTES).

Two of those Cheetos shaped like Harambe

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus cheeto 1

Harambe stole our hearts in 2016 and while his soul has departed he will live on forever in our hearts and of course our shared cultural meme lore. Anyway, someone found a Cheeto that kind of looks like Harambe and another human being paid nearly $100,000 for said cheese-dust thing. More than a year later it’s still too soon. It will always be… too soon. RIP, big guy.

Diversify your portfolio with seven Virgin Mary Grilled Cheeses

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus christ 05

From grilled cheese to tree trunks, and even leftover french toast, in true omnipresent fashion, the Holy Ghost and all of its squad just has a knack for showing up when we least expect it. Nonetheless, after carrying around the 10-year old grilled cheese bearing an uncanny likeness to the Virgin Mary scorched on its surface, Dia Dusyer of, you guessed it, Florida decided it was time to cash-in on this pareidolia prize. Dusyer claims over the course of the 10 years she personally oversaw this sandwich, it never once went moldy — a true testament to its divinity and also the shelf-life of Velvetta infused breads. Eventually, the slightly nibbled snack went to auction fetching $28,000 on eBay. This sandwich should match or pass the 10-year Treasury bond projections. Remember, some people once laughed at the idea of BitCoin. You don’t want to be on the wrong side of history, my friends. The time to invest is now.

Buy a ‘new to you’ liver on the black market

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus liver

For some, the old adage “my body is my temple” holds true, however, for the vast majority of humans, their bodies merely exist as their temporary trashcan. After decades of Michelob and Cup Noodles, things can often go awry internally but in true capitalist spirit, if there’s demand for a product, there is a supply. The black market organ-trafficking business has never been better and apparently based at least on this infographic, you or a dying loved one should be able to score a new-ish liver for a cool $157,000. Based on those estimates, you could go ahead and buy a spare set of eyeballs while you’re at it with enough broccoli left to throw in a spleen for good measure. Go ham, folks.

133 2009 Kia Rios

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus kia

Not unlike the new Lambo SUV, the Kia Rios will get you from point A to point B via four wheels. While 200,000 stacks guarantee you just a single Lambo, that same cash could allow you to theoretically go more than four months without every driving the same Kia Rios twice. Your move, Birdman.

This suspect island

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus island

Most of us can only dream about the prospect of owning our own exotic tropical island, and for just $200,000 you probably have to keep dreaming. However, you can settle on this econo option situated just off of Maine’s southeastern coast in the oft-blustery Atlantic. Based on current projections, you should have at least a couple hundred years before the oceans rise above the craggy shores.

A couple of these Killer Whale Submarines

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus killer whale

Sure, the new Lambo SUV can fly from 0 to 60 in under four seconds, but can it go underwater? Nah. In swims a pair of Schlemmer’s completely unnecessary Killer Whale submarines. Even after purchasing a pair of these bad boys, you should have about $20,000 left to even potentially literally burn in a dumpster.

134,228 Doritos Locos Tacos

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus taco
If you hate yourself, you could always just spend the rest of your fleeting days Livin’ la Vida Loca, cramming sheer tons of Doritos Locos Tacos into your skull. Fork and knife types could conversely opt for 55,710 Mexican Pizzas instead. You do you.

Fulfill your childhood dream of owning a Subway franchise

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus subway restaurant and big merino at goulburn

Who hasn’t dreamed of owning their very own corporate delicatessen? That said, if the Jared Fogle scandal proved anything, Subway can weather even the most central of PR storms and remain both economically viable and nutritionally void. You will probably never top this sick location in Big Merino at Goulburn, Australia, so temper your expectations in advance.

Just Venmo me directly

things you could buy instead of lamborghini urus screen shot 2017 12 05 at 1

I’ll personally see to it that the money makes it to a good cause or something. I’ll just be posted at the “OMG Kittens” slots on hold with the Big Brothers Big Sisters of America waiting for the funds to clear. Scouts honor. Let’s change the world.


NYC mandates minimum wage for Uber, Lyft, other app-based rideshare drivers

New York City's Taxi and Limousine Commission approved a rule that drivers for companies such as Uber and Lyft must be paid at least minimum wage, even though they are independent contractors. The new pay rate includes operating costs.

Spotify is the best streaming service, but its competitors aren’t far behind

It can be hard to decide which music streaming service is for you, so we've picked out the individual strengths of the most popular services, aiming to make your decision a little easier.
Home Theater

These top-line smart speakers conduct the most sophisticated symphony: Your life

Stuck talking to yourself? Get an A.I. assistant to keep you company! Whether you put your stock in Alexa, Google Assistant, or Siri, we've picked out the best smart speaker for any smart home ecosystem.

These winter-warrior cars will never leave you out in the cold

Snow can be an absolute pain if your vehicle isn't optimized to handle that sort of terrain. If brutal snowstorms are an annual part of your life, we recommend you pick up one of these winter-ready vehicles.

Thinking of opting for a car with a diesel engine? Here's what you need to know

Modern diesel-powered models prove that it is possible to build a clean, efficient diesel engine without sacrificing performance. Here's what you need to know about diesel cars, and how they differ from gasoline-powered models.

2020 Toyota Supra caught hiding in a trailer without a shred of camouflage

Toyota's plan to once again lure enthusiasts into showrooms involves bringing back the Supra, one of its most emblematic nameplates. Here's what we know so far about the upcoming coupe, which Toyota is developing jointly with BMW.

Driving a prototype 2020 Passat at Volkswagen’s Arizona Proving Ground

Volkswagen’s Arizona Proving Ground is where new cars are tested to the breaking point, including the 2020 Passat midsize sedan. Ride along as the new Passat completes testing ahead of its 2019 launch.

LM Industries’ autonomous shuttles head to Phoenix, Sacramento campuses

LM Industries will deploy Olli low-speed autonomous shuttles at school campuses in Arizona and California as part of its ongoing "fleet challenge," which asks local groups to propose uses for autonomous vehicles.

Bosch’s CES-bound shuttle concept takes us on a trip to a not-too-distant future

Bosch envisions a future in which driverless shuttles occupy their own market segment. The German firm won't build the shuttles, but it wants to provide everything else, ranging from the drive system to the apps used to hail them.
Emerging Tech

A lidar-equipped truck knows exactly how much de-icer to apply on roads

Lidar is best known as the laser-based technology that helps self-driving cars sense their surroundings. But the city of Knoxville has another, more seasonal use for it: De-icing roads.
Product Review

Boring takes a back seat as 2019 Corolla Hatchback mixes fun with practicality

We drive the 2019 Toyota Corolla Hatchback, the latest hatchback to bear the Corolla name. As the best-selling nameplate in automotive history, Toyota has high expectations to meet. This model mostly lives up to the legacy.

Hertz speeds up car rentals with biometric scan technology

Biometric security technology that uses face, fingerprint, and voice recognition is gaining traction, with Hertz emerging as the latest company to incorporate it into its daily operations.
Product Review

Inside Maserati's Levante SUV beats the heart of a Ferrari

Maserati’s luxury SUV gets a shot in the arm by way of Ferrari-derived V8 power, but is it enough to go toe-to-toe with the established players in the high performance sport-utility segment? Let’s find out.

McLaren puts the pedal to the metal in special-edition OnePlus 6T

The OnePlus 6T is yet another flagship killer smartphone, bringing powerful specifications to a much lower price than the competition. Now, OnePlus has teamed up with McLaren for the OnePlus 6T McLaren Edition.