In 2012, The Colbert Report did a segment on Heracles Research Corporation, maker of the BedBunker. It’s a safe that replaces your box spring, so you can hold your arsenal of 60 rifles under you while you slumber. And because the only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good bed full of guns, Heracles started making their products bullet-resistant.
In addition to the BedBunker, the company also now offers several other household furniture with built-in safes: CouchBunker, TableBunker, and ClosetBunker. For anywhere from $7,780 to $10,720, you can own a bullet-stopping sofa.
You’re going to need a few friends to help you move your CouchBunker, because the safe weighs 650 pounds. The bullet-resistant cushions are optional, but they offer style as well as safety. The couch is available in a range of styles and can have fabric or leather covering. The cushions, which can be used as shields, will stop a .44 Magnum bullet, according to the company.
The people who buy from Heracles obviously have deep pockets to be able to afford such pricey protection, but just who they are isn’t always clear. “People who need this kind of protection don’t usually spread it around by word of mouth,” owner John Adrain told Bloomberg Business.
Heracles isn’t the only company making bullet-resistant furniture. Ballistic Furniture Systems makes bullet-resistant material for furniture for commercial customers such as hospitals and hotels, but customers are also calling the company to outfit safe rooms in their homes, converting a small room, say 400 square feet, into completely bullet-resistant space. The cost for such a project would run between $5,000 to $10,000, CEO Jeffrey A. Isquith estimated.
We’ll say one thing for the CouchBunker: It’s one way to stop unwanted guests from crashing at your place: “Oh, sorry, no, that sofa doesn’t pull out. That’s where I keep my guns.”