A wise man once said “Chaos was the law of nature, order was the dream of man.” Considering more than 90 percent of all species that have ever existed on Earth have gone extinct, it would seem foolish for man to believe it incapable of going the way of the mastodon or the dodo.
While our infrastructure and security systems are designed with backups and fail-safes, these may only delay the inevitable. As best illustrated by Bonini’s paradox, as any system increases in complexity, it too becomes less understandable and consequently even less predictable. Be it a solar flare, pandemic, or nuclear bomb, it would take very little for this order to give way to mass entropy.
These four bunkers were designed to survive the apocalypse, even if humans do not.
This underground complex was built during to the Cold War to withstand a near direct-hit from a 20-megaton nuclear bomb. The site was recently purchased and upgraded by the Vivos Corporation.
This isn’t just some drab, concrete-reinforced hole in the earth. This complex features a full gym, an infirmary, and two generators, as well as a high-grade air filtration systems to filter nuclear, biological, and chemical particulates. There’s also a stockpile of guns and ammunition and even a pet kennel and faux dog park so even ol’ Rover can join the family come Armageddon.
Inhabitants will also enjoy some of the choicest eats the End Times will have to offer. One of the feature dinner spreads includes a tomato and zucchini salad grown on site in the facility’s hydroponic garden, followed by a main course of spaghetti topped with skillet fried steak “chunks.” Guests will then have an offering of turtle brownies for dessert.
Vivos Indiana is built to accommodate up to 80 people for one year. What happens after that one year? Everything should be legit 365 days after the apocalypse, right? Right. Maybe the first go around will be an Apocalypse Lite. With an entry fee of $35,000 per person, this certainly isn’t cheap, but how much are the lives of your loved one really worth?
After the ash settles, the nuclear winter subsides, The Hoosier State very well may become the next cradle of civilization.
Vivos isn’t looking to simply cash in on good old-fashioned American paranoia. Our friends across the pond have their own death-proof hole to hide in when the Reptilians come to collect.
Vivos Europa One is a massive 76-acre complex built inside of a limestone mountain in Rothenstein, Germany. This facility is also constructed to withstand a nearby megaton nuclear blast. According to Vivos, the complex is able to withstand a direct airplane crash, biological/chemical agents, shock waves, earthquakes, and electromagnetic pulses. It is also “tsunami-proof.” Seeing as the facility is more than 300 miles from the ocean, such an event would seem unlikely, but that’s just the level of security this facility ensures.
Europa One is still under construction; when completed, the site will feature plenty of luxuries and panaceas to take your mind off of the fact that everyone you’ve ever loved is dead. Inside there will be restaurants, a bakery, a brewpub, wine cellar, and even a chapel for post-apocalyptic weddings.
The bunker will utilize self-contained water and power systems. The site will also include a DNA vault to preserve the genomes of zoological species, as well as donors. Rooms are selling out quickly. As stated on the Vivos‘ site: “Remember, it wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark!”
Nestled in the Adirondack Mountains, the Silo Home in Saranac, New York is one of the more remote underground bunkers on earth. On the surface, this looks like any other home, however, the beneath this innocuous walkout ranch lies a nuclear missile silo and subterranean command center.
The bunker — located 35 feet underground — was carved out of concrete and was designed to withstand a Soviet nuclear attack. Constructed out of concrete, mixed with epoxy resin, and more than 600 tons of steel rebar, this class of missile silos is considered to be some of the strongest structures ever built by mankind.
In 1965, the silos were decommissioned and the property was then auctioned off by the government. In the late ’90s, the silo was purchased by two individuals who spent the better part of the next two decades converting the silo into livable space and constructing the “decoy house” above the bunker. The property comes equipped with a FAA-approved 2,050 foot paved airstrip as well.
The Underground “Outdoor” Bunker
Built in Las Vegas, this bunker foresees life during the apocalypse as only Sin City could. This home was constructed in 1978 to withstand a nuclear blast by wealthy entrepreneur Girard “Jerry” B. Henderson. With all the Cold War tension, Mr. Henderson looked to tap into a budding market: nuclear holocaust-proof housing for the aesthetically disinclined.
Why simply live in a dreary underground bunker while the nukes rain down when you can live in an subterranean structure designed to mimic the outdoors? Remember, they too mocked Pythagoras. Henderson’s prototype “Underground World Home” features an astroturf four-hole putting green, a swimming pool, two jacuzzis, a dance floor, a bar, a “garden” with fake trees as well as a BBQ seamlessly disguised as a rock.
The home has yet to see an interior design overhaul in decades. With pink toilets, pink carpet, and pink trim accents throughout, the bunker now exists as a time capsule and ode to a tackier time. The lighting can be adjusted to mimic moonlight or daylight, enabling you to at least pretend to feel the fading warmth of our sun even if of our star has been blackened from the sky by ash and pulverized human particulates.
- The coolest waffle makers
- The best electric tea kettles
- Want better beer, fancy cocktails, and ‘aged’ wine? Try these drinking gadgets
- Immerse yourself in blending with the best handheld blenders
- What can your koozie do? A cold drink is just the start