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Hold your sides and check out these April Fools’ Day tech jokes

April 1 is a day when you shouldn’t believe any product announcement being made, as there’s an excellent chance it’ll be utter nonsense. And if it turns out to be real, then either the marketing folk need to be fired for launching on on that day, or your product needs a rethink, as the world clearly thought it was a joke.

We’re here to guide you through the nightmare of what’s real and isn’t with our favorite April Fools’ Day gags for 2017. Keep checking back, as we’ll update with new ones that tickle our collective funny bones.

MH40C1 Concrete Over-Ear Headphones

Master & Dynamic concrete headphones

Master & Dynamic is known for its use of premium materials to get the best sound quality. We’ve seen headphones made from forged aluminium, leather, and brass, but this weekend the New York-based audio company dropped some heavy news via the company blog.

The engineers introduced the MH40C1 — wireless on-ear headphones that weigh in at 10.6 pounds. The company promises the same premium quality and comfort its customers are used to. This set is based on the MH40 over-ear headphones, which were introduced in May 2014.

“Master & Dynamic has consistently chosen the road less traveled. As of today, that road is paved with concrete,” said company founder and CEO Jonathan Levine.

The concrete MH40 Wireless On-Ear Headphones are available for $399.

Honda Horn Emojis

Wouldn’t it be nice if your car’s horn could more closely convey your intentions and messages? After all, there’s no difference between a short, polite “thank you” beep and an impatient, longer “hey, whattaya doing” lean besides the length of the honk. Honda is here to help.

Horn Emojis come to us from Honda Dream Laboratories and are described by Chief Engineer Janet Parker as “a driver-to-driver communication system that offers a full range of expressive horn sounds connected to a few familiar faces.” Simply press a button to show how you feel.

A “happy Honda honk” can be used to say “hello,” while a more defeating-sounding one will let you share your dismal rush hour mood with those around you.

The special emoting horn can be found on the all-new Odyssey — at least during this year’s April Fools’ weekend.

A Live Tinder Date

The world’s most popular dating app matches 26 million people globally each day, but despite this, many of us might not know what goes on when people connect. For those who are too nervous to take the plunge into a world where a potential partner could be just a swipe away, Tinder has something just for you.

The folks behind the swipe celebrated different types of “dates” by live streaming one on Facebook. The video went up and delivered as promised. Go here to see for yourself (scroll down to the post from March 31 at 3:04 p.m. ET).

EventBrite Retro

St.-Petersburg-Pier-Concert

Have you ever longed to go back in time and revisit a sporting, music, or other event from your youth, or one that you missed out on? Or are you an old soul who would love to travel back to an iconic moment that occurred before you were born?

“Eventbrite allows you to experience today’s greatest events,” Eventbrite CEO Julia Hartz stated in a company blog post. “With Eventbrite Retro, you’ll soon be able to attend iconic live experiences from the past.”

To write the software, the engineering team turned to O’Reilly Auto Parts, which offers a crucial piece of equipment that could usually be found in gullwinged time-traveling cars.

This may signal the end of FOMO (fear of missing out), but caution must be taken. “ … the last thing we’d want to do was disrupt the time space continuum and create a paradox,” said Principal QA engineer Noah Harris.

Kodak Moments Experiment

We all dread the loss of our smartphone data. You can’t put a price on your photos, videos, and any sensitive data, but that didn’t stop the people from Kodak Moments UK from trying.

A man from the company offered passersby the chance to try a “super fast charger” he was carrying around. Trusting people handed over their phone, which he placed on the charging pad. The screen then went black with the static words “Deleting … ,” “Deleting Data,” and “Deleting Cloud Backups” along the top and a terrifyingly fast scrolling of what is presumably being purged below.

Each innocent bystander took it differently, ranging from astonishment to rising anger. The man then offered a pittance to cover the damages, going up to 200 British Pounds.

Before they can completely break down, the company rep showed them that their phones were safely hidden away, and the affected one was his.

Kodak Moments wants to remind you that printed photos, a service offered by the company through its app, can never be accidentally erased.

Google Wind

Holland’s strengths lie in its economies and DJs, but it also deals with heavy rainfall 145 days a year, according to this video from Google Nederland.

So the Google Cloud Platform team is launching Google Wind, which will utilize Holland’s windmills to clear the skies of rainy clouds.

“Google Wind then uses Machine Learning to recognize cloud patterns and orchestrate the network of windmills when rain is approaching,” the video description reads. “Test results look very promising.”

Samsung Exynos Yoga Processor

With rumors flying around regarding a flexible phone from Samsung, the Korean tech conglomerate decided to play along with an April Fools’ gag. In doing so, it got more publicity for its Exynos Processor, the latest of which should be making their way into the company’s flagship S8 phones.

Samsung tweeted a photo of its new Exynos Yoga processor, which was designed to flex within bendy phones.

Amazon Petlexa

Now your furbabies can take advantage of their humans’ smart home tech and toys. Petlexa gives your furry family members the ability communicate with Alexa through Amazon Echo. This new pet-friendly feature can track the steps your hamster runs in his wheel, order some sushi (through Amazon, of course) for the cat, or help the dog play fetch.

Swim Desk

It wasn’t too long ago that standing desks became the must-have alternative to traditional sit-down workspaces. They purported to improve efficiency while reducing strain on your body from sitting down all day. Then standing up alone wasn’t enough — we should exercise while we work, via contraptions down at our feet. You can walk, stretch, and pedal your way to health, all while making a living.

You could take things a step further and get a treadmill desk. But what if you have bad joints or are unable to use one for other health reasons? Because of this, people swear by swimming. It should come as no surprise that the folks at ThinkGeek put their top minds to work to bring you the Swim Desk.

At $1,999, the heated Swim Desk weighs over eight tons when full, so check your building codes before purchase. You can adjust the current put out by the 5-horsepower motor, and integrated LED lights are helpful for those late nights at the office.

Netflix Live

On March 31, Netflix previewed a new show called Netflix Live, in which Will Arnett offers narrations of objects he’s viewing, mostly related to what you’d find in an office. His seemingly off-the-cuff remarks include descriptions, anecdotes, and numerous tangents.

Joke or not, the show was supposed to premiere on April 1, but it has since been canceled. Netflix had this to say on its website:

“Netflix Live has been canceled. We miscalculated the number of people who like to binge-watch microwaves. Dave from analytics is in trouble.”

Google Maps and Ms. Pac-Man

Google Maps Ms. Pac-Man

Last April Fools’, Google Maps let users play Pac-Man using its software, and this year you can wander around your favorite neighborhood in the guise of his wife. That’s right — you can now play Ms. Pac-Man on your computer or mobile device using Google Maps.

We tried it out in New York City; an ideal stage due to its grid layout. The game will not work if you try it in an area with few roads (Central Park wasn’t suitable), but you can click that you’re feeling lucky and go somewhere else.

Just like in the classic game, there are ghosts, dots, and Power Pellets. When you run off one side of the screen, you will appear on the other. Best of all, the original intro jingle and sound effects are all intact. To play, simply open Google Maps and click on the Ms. Pac-Man icon.

We cleared an entire stage, including all the dots and cherries, and the game didn’t end. Perhaps we expected a level 2 with more traffic, ahem, ghosts?

Lyft Mono

Ride-hailing app Lyft has gone all out with this one. The Mono is a piece of wearable tech for grabbing a Lyft ride with just a flick of the thumb. The LED lighting array — in magenta, naturally — pulsates at different speeds, depending on how close your Lyft car is. There’s a glitzy website devoted to the Mono, and even a pop-up shop in San Francisco where you can try it out, according to The Verge. But don’t fall for it — the Mono is very much an April Fools’ Day joke.

However, that’s not going to stop Lyft giving a few of the versions it built for the promotion away, and you can enter here.

Man Crates Man Freights

Gift service Man Crates now lets you do more than send a crate as a gift. The Man Freights service enables you to deliver it yourself, inside a crate of your own. Provided you’re a “medium-sized person” and can get to a delivery center, you’ll get nailed inside the crate, ready to be handed over to the recipient after only two or three business days.

OnePlus Dash Energy

Dash Charge is OnePlus’s own fast charging system for its smartphones, and now it’s introducing Dash Energy, which brings power-boosting goodness to you personally. Apparently, it’s a “Neural performance enhancer instilled into a caffeinated beverage suitable for human consumption,” which sounds an awful lot like an energy drink to us. Check out the video above to see the effects, which include instant alertness, energy, and concentration.

The great thing is you can actually try it out, because OnePlus will be distributing Dash Energy at a few special locations in London, plus through online through promotions in Europe, Finland, and India on April 1. You can find a list of them here.

Lexus Lane Valet

Lexus feels our pain. There’s nothing worse than getting stuck behind a slow lane hog, but with its new Lane Valet feature, we can shift them out of the way safely and easily. It’s autonomous driving technology, but for the car in front of you.

Kik Storyz

We love subtle April Fools’ Day gags, and this is definitely one of them. Kik Messenger has introduced Storyz, a way to share tiny video clips through the platform that friends can subscribe to and watch. The videos then expire after 23 hours and 57 minutes. Wait. That’s almost exactly what Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp copied from Snapchat, right? Kik’s not falling for it, and neither should you. The only thing is if Kik does add a Story-style feature in the future, this may come back to haunt it.

World of Tanks — Next Stop: Mars

Another April Fools’ gag you can actually try out for yourself. World of Tanks heads to Mars for a limited time, where you battle against each other and the alien hordes in a spectacular low-gravity environment, complete with teleportation units for the ultimate in surprise attacks. The game mode, called Next Stop: Mars, is only available between March 31 and April 2.

SkunkLock Organic

Want an environmentally friendly way of protecting your bike, that also looks a tiny bit cute? Then you want the SkunkLock Organic, a follow-up to the company’s unusual bike lock that’s filled with a vomit-inducing gas. That’s right, the SkunkLock isn’t the April Fools’ gag. The SkunkLock Organic attaches a real skunk to your bike.

Roku SnackSuggest

It’s sometimes difficult to satisfy food cravings when you’re watching Game of Thrones. Roku’s new SnackSuggest feature says you need chicken wings, mutton, and ale to complete the experience. For Vampire Diaries, how about some garlic fries and red velvet cupcakes? It’s scientific too, basing snack recommendations on your BMI, dietary requirements, and taste preferences. Watching The Walking Dead may never be the same again …

Honda H-Swipe

Why restrict Tinder’s popular swipe-based method of finding a date to an app? Honda realized the windscreen wipers on its cars could perform a similar function, and so the automaker is introducing s-wipers, the H-Swipe app, and geo-location tech on future vehicles. Location data finds a potential date, and the wipers are used to signal your interest — left for “phwoor!” and right for “nahhh” presumably.

Updated on 04-01-2017 by Albert Khoury: Added more April Fools’ Day jokes and gags.

Article originally published on 03-31-2017.