A few years ago, people noticed you could leave reviews of entire continents on Google Maps. The results were much as you’d expect, and it seems you can no longer leave stars and comments for North America, Europe, Asia, and the rest. But you can still do so for bodies of water, deserts, and other landmarks.
Much like the reviews for continents, there’s a mix of typical internet responses: Earnest remarks about a place’s beauty from tourists and locals, a dash of racism, and one-star reviews that nonetheless proclaim a gulf “very nice.” Lots of people give the Nile five stars for helping with their homework. Sometimes there will be a cluster of reviews around the same time with the same theme, like the children of parents who left them on Disappointment Island. No matter where you travel via Google Maps, there will be dad jokes.
These commenters aren’t the first to review a destination they’ve never visited. Edgar Allen Poe once wrote of the Lofoten archipelago in Norway, “A panorama more deplorably desolate no human imagination can conceive.” Clicking on Google Maps lets you zoom in on natural wonders that are often otherwise inaccessible and at least gives you the chance to see if you agree with others’ assessments.
“Very north, not quite west enough.” Anthony Manns (5 stars)
“its a boring island i couldnt even play minecraft here.” Benjamin Sirota (1 star)
“I have been here for five days, send help.” Hailey Undiano (5 stars)
Bad experience, really cold and hard to breathe because of its height.” Georg Heimann (1 star)
“This is the best Sea ever., especially if you are fat mammal.” Anoni.mouse same (5 stars)
“A very friendly body of water… upon my arrival, I greeted the Barents Sea- it waved back! It’s desolate there- sea for yourself!” Jason R (5 stars)
“This place didn’t unify Germany. It’s a fraud.” Liam MacDonald (1 star)
“10/10 Hop is a great movie.” RojoFern (5 stars)
“Nice Island there are many polar bears.” Mika Ferrageau (5 stars)
“Hudson Hawk was way better.” Kyle James (3 stars)
Caribbean Sea
“Great place, met a neat guy named jack sparrow. Wish i could say more about this place but I gotta go find my wallet.” Max Smith (5 stars)
“The name is rather misleading. I only saw 10 dogs in the entire experience and only 1 OF THEM was a Labrador. 0/10 would not recommend.” Alexander Hyde (1 star)
“i overall think this is quite a great river. It is one of the reasons civilizations started and is quite amazing how it flows north. overall, i only give this 4 stars because there is too much water.” Dezyderiusz Sakowski (4 stars)
“the rocks werent as rocky as they should be. get it together Colorado.” Owen Easton (1 star)
“kinda cool but also salty…guess someone made it angry.” Gaia G (2 stars)
“No vegan options :( Two stars for the view though. Probably won’t be back.” micheal burgess (2 stars)
