Skip to main content

Sick of the Twitter IPO buzz? Ease the pain with our definitive drinking game

definitive twitter ipo day drinking game everyone doesnt care beer bird
Image used with permission by copyright holder

Well break out the confetti and your fun-time clothes, because it is Twitter’s freaking IPO day everyone! This is a moment we’ve been waiting for, what the Internet has long been building to. All those tweets, favorites, and retweets, finally amounting to something that we can all, as a collective Web community, be a part of and have a hand in. Today is more magical than Christmas or your birthday; more special than a unicorn; sweeter than a child’s first laugh!

Just kidding, it’s none of those things, and just because you like using Twitter and actively take part in this thing we know as the Internet doesn’t mean you have to walk around today pretending like you care. For the vast majority of us – even those of us who are very, very wrapped into the social network – Twitter’s IPO does not mean much. And you don’t have to listen to all those articles and pundits telling you otherwise.

Luckily, I have got the game for you! If you plan on using Twitter today or even just watching the local news tonight, you can bet your bottom dollar that there will be much ado made about the IPO hype. And in order to make it all a little more interesting, I propose a drinking game of sorts. Break out the goes-down-easy vodka or some light beers and a healthy knowledge of when you’ve had enough. Let’s do this.

Get your weekly teardown of the tech behind PC gaming
Check your inbox!

For every bald white guy you can spot in this picture from the Twitter IPO, take a shot.

twitter ipo
Image used with permission by copyright holder

For every newscaster says “hashtag: stock market!” or “hashtag: Wall Street!” take a shot.

…or that. 

For every article that says “What Twitter’s IPO means to/for [fill in the blank here],” take a shot.

For every humblebrag about being a Twitter investor, take a shot.

For each time you see some variation of this picture, take a shot.

ebd twitter
Image used with permission by copyright holder

For each superfluous article about Jack Dorsey’s haircut or the 10 best songs to celebrate the IPO to, take a shot.

For every live blog, take a shot.

twitter liveblog
Image used with permission by copyright holder

Editors' Recommendations

Molly McHugh
Former Digital Trends Contributor
Before coming to Digital Trends, Molly worked as a freelance writer, occasional photographer, and general technical lackey…
X now offers audio and video calls, but it’s easy to turn off
The new X sign replacing the Twitter logo on the company's headquarters in San Francisco.

A couple of months after landing the CEO job at X (formerly Twitter) in May, Linda Yaccarino said: “X will be the platform that can deliver, well ... everything.”

Part of that includes audio and video calls, which the company has just started to roll out for users globally.

Read more
How to delete or deactivate your Facebook account
Google Pixel Fold in Obsidian with Facebook filled screen after rotating.

Maybe you just need to take a break from using Facebook. Or maybe you haven't used your Facebook account in awhile and don't plan to in the future. Whatever your reasons, you should know that you have two clear options when it comes to doing away with Facebook.

If you just need a break and will likely need your account in the future, you can deactivate your Facebook account. If you've moved on to greener social media pastures or just don't need your account anymore, you can delete your Facebook account too.

Read more
YouTuber gets more than just clicks for deliberately crashing plane
YouTuber Trevor Jacob jumps from his plane shortly before it crashes.

YouTuber Trevor Jacob jumps from his plane shortly before it crashes. Trevor Jacob/YouTube

It was two years ago when YouTuber Trevor Jacob posted a dramatic video of his solo flight that ended with the plane crashing, though not before he jumped out of the single-engine aircraft to parachute to safety.

Read more